Quilts, 2 flags (one USA and one ALASKA), a sequin full length evening gown/never worn (wonder why not??) that my sister gave me, purses that I never use, 2 vintage dresses/brand-new that I want to give away to someone that would love them (are the late '60's vintage?). All sorts of junkjunkjunk!!
I am on this attack plan that has 3 phases--de-junk/scrub/paint. My deadline is Halloween. Halloween of 2014! I better hustle. times a wasting. I lost all of 2013 but I'm going to mosey as fast as I can muster and get this place ready. For what? I'm thinking on that one.
some might find it pathetic that at my age I have so much clutter etc. What I would like to do is just get up every morning and write and get in touch with friends etc. uh-oh! etc. I said I'd stop using that so much. So I now have my first item on my Wanting to Achieve in 2014. maybe it's more powerful to say Goin' to Achieve. Maybe just a simple one liner... My 2014 List.
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New Years Eve-- I heard from my friend Mariah. She used to live here but moved to Kansas with her hubby and 4 kiddos. I hadn't heard hardly a thing from her for a year and was glad to finally hear from her. She informed me that she has acknowledged that she is gay and is divorced now. At first I was like...oh, I'm not that shocked/surprised. After a rather sleepless night I told her that actually I was completely stunned. Still processing all the facts. Asking all my dozens of questions. She and I have spent lots of time talking about life and the Gospel before she moved. Now here we are talking about the fact she is gay and has a woman friend in the same Ward. She is desirous to stay active as is the other woman. She said-- you can tell others. I'm not comfortable in making it seem like gossip and individually telling people. I have no idea if everyone here already knows with the exception of me or what but she did say it was fine to blog. I'm concerned for my friend. I don't want her mistreated or her children persecuted in any way.
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from Mariah:..I realize that there is no worn path, but I have no control over that. I am not sure what the future completely holds. The options for me are not the same as options for a straight person. I wish they were, but I have no control over that as well. Yes I live in a very conservative place...not ideal in many ways, but like I said the ward has been EXTREMELY supportive. I have been scared at times of persecution, but I have been pleasantly surprised that people have been so understanding. ....
You mentioned that it being gay is not approved behavior, but the church has actually changed its views on being gay over the years. At this point if you look at http://www.mormonsandgays.org/, the current position of the church is that being gay is not a choice (Yes I am sure that I am! :-) ) and not a sin. They say that acting on it is. I have questioned my bishop of what it exactly means to act on it and apparently there is not a clear understanding to that question. Different bishops and stake presidents seem to have different opinions. Some bishops and stake presidents (like ours) say you can hold hands..etc, but other bishops (from experiences I have read about) say that it is not ok to even hold hands. The church has also changed it position saying that in the majority of cases it is not advisable that a gay individual get married and try and live a heterosexual life style. I believe the current expectation is that a gay person is expected to stay celibate (which is ironic only because the church has criticized other church's who practice celibacy ;-) ) , and that being gay is "not an eternal condition." At this point I just can't fathom the idea of having such a fundamental part of who I am changed in the eternities. Figuring this out has helped my life make sense. I wouldn't say I would choose to be gay, but at this point there is no way I would choose not to be. I can't live my life wishing I had a different life. I am just truly grateful for the life I have been given. I don't at all feel like I have my life jacket attached by a paper clip or that I have a hold of the wrong end of a chain saw.
(that last sentence was in response to a rather frantic note I wrote her)....
I'm feeling like you've grabbed hold of a chainsaw. by the chain! there is no certainty in this. no well worn path. no example of happy ever afters as the Church is adamant on no marriage or Temple marriage of same sex. you, my dear, are in real gnarly white water and you have paper clipped your survival vest on. (you know I'm always so dramatic!) Where do you see this going? what does the future hold. so you will forever just be holding hands, not married, fully active in Church, attending the Temple?.... or what do you see on the horizon? Persecution. Are you aware that being gay is not approved behavior? especially a Mormon!!!
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Mariah- when time permits write a guest blog. say whatever you want to say. My understanding is the Church does not say homosexuality is sin but acting on it is. so we are on the same page there.
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I told her of my concern for the 9 children impacted by this. ages 2-13.she said....
In regards to my kids being hurt, obviously I would never do anything to hurt my kids, but with that being said I would never want my kids to feel like they had to hide a part of who they are. I think it is a consuming and destructive thing to feel like you would have to pretend you are someone else just to be accepted in society.
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I told her...I think the entire gay movement is going to cause a huge divide in the Church and we will have a Christian Civil War right within our own ranks. Last days. It's the last days!
she said...
I really would much rather consider it gay awareness versus a movement. Gay people have always existed they just lived there life behind closed doors. If you have time I would like to encourage you to watch a couple clips and tell me what you think of them.
1) http://www.nomorestrangers.org/john-dehlin-delivers-a-tedx-talk-on-being-an-ally/
2) http://www.upworthy.com/a-4-year-old-girl-asked-a-lesbian-if-shes-a-boy-she-responded-the-awesomest-way-possible?g=3
3) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ym0jXg-hKCI
I really am doing well with my minor chainsaw injuries!! :-) Love......Mariah
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Mariah- I was your friend before your declaration and I still am. That being said though...I won't march or wear rainbow ribbons or sign petitions or that sort of thing. I will spend my time studying Gospel things. I know you know that. I will look at the 3 things you sent me but that will most likely be the end of my studying the subject. I'm still a Bible believer and it preaches against same sex relationships. We will agree that our friendship is still alive and well and that the Lord has a lot of sorting out to do on judgement day. Does that sound okay to you? I also know that you will see humor in the fact that I'm posting this after a day of throwing things out of my closet!!
So clarify or whatever, the hodgepodge, I've made of some of our notes. Or give me the word and I'll delete the entire thing.
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