Breaking loose of small things!!!

Did not get landslided and buried beneath my stuff but sorry, I seemingly dropped out of sight!  Without so much as a word!

So you know my friend Myra Faye will be treated for 2 cancerous brain tumors but the treatments are not yet scheduled.  I told her we need to play while she feels like it and before she has to start focusing on healing/recovery.  So for the last 3 days that is what we've done.  movies seen- Saving Mr. Banks/The Book Thief/Frozen.  2 stops at Cash & Carry.  1 lunch.  Twice we tried for dinner but one time I wanted to get home and once I got us lost so we opted to forget the dinner try and had lunch instead.  I'm getting excited about Family Search so we also spent a bit of time with me trying to get her on site.  Bob wasn't home and neither of us could figure out her user name/pass word.  And I tried mine and it didn't work either! Oh, yes.  the blind leading the blind. (go see the movies.  excellent!!)

I didn't take a picture of the 4 purses I gave away.  My sister's friend Linda had gone to New York and brought back 2 designer purses for Dixie.  Frankly she didn't care for them (Dixie loves bling and these were sort of lovely but plain.) The bags were in a heap on the floor and I laughed when I saw the Prada logo.  I'd seen it before but with the Hunter boot issue, that I had a near heart attack over, it just made me laugh.  I'd felt that possibly Linda had passed some street corner and some mafia looking guy whipped open his jacket and offers authentic Prada handbags.  So I went on line and it is a fake.  They have a site that tells you how to identify fakes.  So Gloria got a knock-off purse.  She doesn't read my blog so she won't know about the fake but I also gave her a real Dooney & Bourke.  this was not from NY.  From my sister (don't tell her I gave it away.  okay?)  Anyhow, white leather body, all the bells and whistles, tan leather trim, shoulder strap and handle, the real detailed DB logo.  The real deal.  Her husband drops by for a visit with our HT and I ask if the purses worked out.  He said, All but one.  I grabbed that white pouch one and am going to use it to carry ammunition.  Leather bag like that is hard to come by.  It's perfect for hauling ammo.  I tried to control my convulsive laughter about the fate of that spendy bag slung over the neck of this Santa girth man or him daintily carrying it in his very large hand.  He was so happy to get that leather bag.  I told him I hope he enjoys it and it works the way he plans.

Well, enough about that.

My bathroom.  My bathroom is small.  It's the big bathroom in our little place but it's small nonetheless.  I can not fully stretch my arms out side to side.  I love my bathroom  I don't care one bit about size.  Only a couple of things are heaven in a bathroom for me.  Running Water.  #1 absolute bit of heaven.  Unlimited running water.  #2 conveniences are indoors.  and there only need to be 3 items.  A shower (NOT a tub of any sort.)  A sink (plumbed so it drains)  A toidy (that flushes)  Heaven. Bliss. A dream come true.  I could tell you many tales of why that is all I need and will never want for more but that is a story/stories for another time!!

And I have things that might seem strange decor wise but I love them.  such as.....

Picture by a local Homer artist .  at the bottom of the fish she printed....

Yesterday's News- Today's Fishwrapper

I have always enjoyed the perspective of that phrase and love this picture that I've had 35 years.

and I love this old one also!  Sort of tromp l'oeil like.  And I like that feeling.  It's totally out-sized and just makes my soul happy.  When I revamp I will keep both of these pictures.  Always.

In a strange way, I think I'm so basic and simple and yet I apparently have this compulsion to save the world with my co-dependency behavior.  I don't want anyone to suffer.  So I seem to save all creature comforts from reading material, to hotel shampoos etc. to give out at some point to anyone in need.  When I go to a hotel I will use my own shampoo etc. and take the hotels little courtesy bottles and cloths to buff your shoes, shower caps, sewing kits with needles so minuscule that you can't hardly see them, vanity kits with q-tips and a cotton pad to remove your nail polish, shampoo, lotions and potions and bits and pieces of what could easily be labeled flotsam and jetsam to bring home.  So if I stay 3 days-- I squirrel away 3 days of loot for the needy, bring it home and stuff it in my bitty bathroom. 

One time I gave a big bag of it away to the battered women's shelter.  I don't know if that was good or not but I did give a lot away but then it built back up.

This was a very hard sort for me....

I kept sorting and paring down what to keep, to throw, and making a sack to have on hand for others, maybe 72 hour kits or maybe an emergency or the likes.  I was really struggling with it.  I had stuff upon stuff.  all new. 7 little floss samples from dentist and all that sort of stuff.  lots of outdated things like make-up remover pads.  3 jars of cream.  I just filled one jar.  took a deep breath and tossed other 2 in trash.

I had my give bag ready to go.  Terry saw it and he just irritated the life out of me as he put his hands under his chin and said, in  pleading voice--Oh, please give me some of those dry makeup remover cloths and some hotel shampoo to go with my rice and base.  The RS is spared planning his funeral or finding me bail to get out of jail but it just irritated me and then it made me laugh.  I just dumped it on the table and ceremoniously swept all of it in the trash!  There was more than you can imagine!!!

You are pretty much on your own folks!  I threw away your bounty!!

I think this describes me....

I'm repairing my need for intensive rescue of all RS women &  the Ward & community at large

Along with my simple little bathroom, I need to mostly concern myself about my simple little self.  Tell you what--You run out of something and need help, we will just share what I have.  Yes, I did save some things but I intend to use them.  I did save a pack for traveling and actually put it in my travel bag.

It was interesting to me that I did not have any make-up to throw away or pine over keeping. 

The only things that were really mine and not "rescue" material.

I have mascara also but not much else.  I like really nice make-up and shampoo and face creams.  I use it until it's gone but I did find a lot of small bottles that went with larger ones as a bonus on moisturizers/shampoo so I am going to use them up. (maybe they are outdated!  I didn't check the keepers!)  when I get back here to spruce it up decor wise then I may have another trashing to do.

What a lot I learned about myself.  I will share what I have on hand but not save things to save others.  Yes.  you can still have your rice, wheat, cereal, assorted grains, and beans that I've saved for you but you will need to buy your own base or I can lend you a bit of mine.  shampoo and soap and etc.  it's gone!  tough love.  I know. I know.  sorry.

Mining in dustville!!!

Thanks for rallying around my friend with your prayers and love.  Right now it seems there are so many that I know and love that are struggling.  Beyond prayer and love and care for my friends, I always feel the greatest thing I can do is forge ahead with gusto and live life as fully as I can.  I continue to charge forth with my Phase One of my 4 part plan.  Phase one-dejunk/downsize.

Check marks by our closet and the office and our bedroom.  Sunday I visited two Ward Conferences and I was surprised at the encouragement I got on my project plus the interest of what lies hidden under the layer of dust and spider webs!

Jennie said...You have stuff under your bed??!!!  She is so young and innocent and sweet and I hated to own up to the fact but I did!  Others have told me that they too have stuff stuffed under their beds.

The big reveal of what was lurking under that big ol' heavy Tempure Pedic? sp?....  see for yourself!!

leftover wallpaper!

The only box I didn't sort through is the one upper right, under the picture.  Some of my Mom's things.  will do later.

Stunned to find BRAND NEW dress shoes with a pencil sketch of left foot!  How did this happen????

Empty box of Christmas plates that I gave to Granddaughters.

Box of salad plates that I couldn't find to give with dinner plates.  Hmmmmm.

An adorable tea-set that I haven't found for long time.  Somewhere I have two other sets.  Madness????

I have looked everywhere (except under bed!) for my wonderful book.  also some notes.

should be flogged for this.  OLD pictures!!!  just scattered in a heap!  what on earth???!!?

more flogging needed.  ancient album!  unwrapped.  Neglected.  dusty!  woe is me!!!

timeline/dreamboard/vision scape class assignment.  years old.  Collage I made and loved doing and looking at it! 

amends properly made to old pictures and collage.  tidy and tight.  encased in plastic bag.

This next part really got to me.  My co-dependent self in full gear.  When I was RSP I had mini meltdowns, in privacy of course, about the sisters not having enough food stored.  We had a series of lessons on every subject under the sun.  I felt they were ready and if not, it wasn't for lack of trying to get them all on board.  Under my bed I found my private backup plan.  Baking powder for biscuits and an assortment of Base for beans or rice or wheat.  Of course I would give them wheat etc.!
Now I'm more about ....I'll share what I have on the stove cooking.  We'll pray.  It will be enough. At the time of these purchases I was not of that mind set.  Cuckoo.  Cuckoo.

Trashed -5# baking powder.  1/4 teaspoon is one serving.  a lot of biscuits raising!!!

box of base

1 teaspoon per 1 cup of water. 

Goodbye!  this one hurt!  ouch!!!  would have been so yummy.  Wish I'd remembered it hidden safely away!

I called about the base, hoping against hope, that it's years overdue expiration would not matter because it had so much salt in it.  When I said 2007 to the customer service rep., she repeated it stunned-like.... two-thousand and SEVEN??  Then I gave my salt spiel.  She was rather rude and said she couldn't believe I kept it that long without using it but.... NO! our product has real chicken bits in it and it would spoil and YES! you do need to discard it and not use it.  I didn't dare tell her how many jars I had on hand.  May as well have thrown a wad of bills in the trash and burned it up.  This was painful for me to do!!  sort of wah-wahing here.  Me the silly goose!!  sigh.

Tucked behind a chair in the corner I found seeds for planting and seeds for sprouting that I really did think were safely in my freezer.  Not!

10#'s.  yes, TEN pounds of sprouting seed to go with your biscuits and beans and base.  commit me!!

Magazines, anyone??

Tore my heart out!  So wrong of me!!  I did save 5 more conference issues.  there.  I'm all better!

Uh-oh, Terry being tempted by Martha Stewart!!!

Surely I deserve a metal, an award, sympathy.  something for bravery and courage.  Stifled sobs.

Well, boy howdy!  Would you look at that!!!  should have taken a picture after I vacuumed & moved picture!  All done!!

Next on de-junk list...my small bathroom that has a dumpster load of little bottles and jars and soaps and that sort of stuff!!

A dream came true for a long ago friend!!

So much on my mind...so much I want to say about adversity/challenges, Hunter Boots!, cleaning under bed (check off my list!) and what seems a million others things.  One thing I really miss is, stacked to hilt as it was, I could still put my fingers on what I wanted on some quotes.  Try as I might I couldn't find the one quote that I so wanted to share with my friends that are up against so much. My mind feels sort of fried right now so I'm just going to let the dust settle on different things and talk about something entirely different.  Totally off subject.  Atz Kilcher and his debut at the Grand Ole Opry!!!

Everything I talk about involving friends seems to be in the million year ago category!  Umpteen years ago, Atz was Terry's Counselor in the Homer Branch Presidency.  His wife and I were the dearest friends.  We loved them so much.  Shane and Jewel were just little kids.  I remember when Atz Lee was born and about his name.  Atz LEE.  Nancy LEE.  Atz and Nedra were super talented.  About the time we moved to Homer, Atz parents divorced.  They lived out East End and drove cattle to the head of the Bay.  The parents were true homesteaders and the father Yule was considered a little eccentric.

Atz and Nedra were both artists on many levels.  They decided to go to Nashville and see if they could get a record deal.  Atz had written some songs and they got a demo ready and then actually cut a record.  We donated money as did all of their friends and family to get them to Tennessee.  One of his songs was about Truck Wheels.  About the men that drove the highways.  Those big 18 wheelers.  We were sure it would be a hit!!
here is the record jacket... (that is so blurry you can't read it!!)
 

Tennessee did not bare fruit and they wanted so much to sing at the Grand Ole Opry and make it bigtime but that was not on that particular horizon.

I listened to Jewel sing Friday night but first I heard her tell a bit about her life.  I thought about making her french toast at our house and how sweet she was.  One very short terse sentence grabbed my attention....My Mother left when I was 8.  Just stated as a fact and the story just went right ahead with no detail or mention of anything.  I thought to myself...how little we probably every really know of the details of others lives.  How much pain is masked with a simple sentence?  How many years can such a simple declaration cover?

Nedra is the one that made it possible for us to adopt our youngest son.  At that time she was very active in the Church and as I said, we were the dearest of friends.

Somewhere along the line things started to unravel.  They moved to Anchorage and our connection became more gossamer.  Eventually they were not involved with Church and then divorced.

For some time Nedra was Jewel's manager and they lived in vans, so goes the press release, and then eventually that faded to nothing.

I remember Nedra and Jewel singing and Friday night I wondered where she was, what she was doing, how she is doing and what she thought about Atz actually made it to the Opry.  Nedra is someone that I can't identify with any more.  She has morphed into a very free spirit.  Last I heard she has nothing to do with her family.  I hope that isn't true. I have no idea where she is.  for a long while she just moved from place to place and stayed with different folks along the way.

My own regrets are losing a friendship with a wonderful person.  At that stage in my young life, I didn't know how to deal with someone that had been Temple sealed, divorced, excommunicated, no longer a believer.  I was ill prepared.  I didn't do good with knowing how to salvage what we had and focus on the love.  This entire experience really helped me to start to understand that it's so important to have unconditional love for everyone.  I was hurt, heartbroken, wounded, offended, and I just backed off crying my eyes out.  Just being honest. I had a lot of hurt for a very long time.  Way to long but it took time for me to figure it out.  Nowadays I would not react or handle things as I did then.  Such is life.  well, my life anyhow!

Atz suffered a lot but he rallied, kept singing, taught school and now has that TV show that so many are watching.  Jewel of course has made her own career.  I remember the night she gave a concert in the Homer high school auditorium to raise funds as she was going to Julliard.  Our entire town was so proud of her!  Sitting there listening to her sing I had the thought-- if I had lots of money, I would love to support her, as she develops her talents and becomes famous.  I thought that would be so much fun to do.

As an aside.  I love when Jewel sings pure country or bluegrass or yodels or does opera.  light opera?  Not a wild fan of her breathy Marilyn Monroe style on some of her latest ones.  She has a rather, strained at times, relationship with Homerites.  It's fun to know someone who achieved their dreams and has magnified their talents.

Our family is so happy for Atz.  It's been a long time coming.  He looks great and it looks to me that he has on a shirt from one of the Russian villages, either Anchor Point way, Nikolaevsk or out East End Road to The Old Believers.  I recognize that needle work and shirt style.

Somewhere, it is on my list, in the boxes of photos I will be going through, I have a couple of pictures of those days and I'll share when I find them.

I learned a lot from this entire scenario, in my earth sketch,  that for me was bitter/sweet but it has helped me to grow and learn so much in life.  Atz was sweet to contact Terry after he had his stroke.
 (By the way, it's been one year ago since Terry had that stroke.  A whole year!)

So Happy for Atz!!!!  Singing with his Jewel.

Have no idea who these people on the left are but wanted you to see Atz shirt and his wife Bonnie.

Jewel and Atz

After I wrote this blog I was so filled with nostalgia and love for that marvelous period of growth in my life and love for my old friends,  that I sent Atz a little message (me being so modern!)  such a teeny little picture of he and Bonnie!

Atz...just want you to know that Terry and I are so proud of you and so happy for you. seems like many years ago that you were singing Truck Wheels in our living room and we just knew you'd make it big time in TN and now!!! you have!! hope you just soaked it up and enjoyed every single minute. Hi to Jewel and your wifey! Love from the Seljestads

Yep. The good ole days. U say hi to all too

Please, pray for my friend.

Let me tell you just a bit about my friend Myra Faye Earl and her husband Bob.  When we moved here 25 years ago I met her that first evening.  We have enjoyed our association all of these years and count ourselves blessed being friends.

Bob, her sweet husband, is also our friend and we love both of them so much.

They have each had a lot of serious health issues over the past few years.  One was Myra Faye having cancer, radiation, and a little snippet off the top of one ear. 

She is the organist/pianist extraordinaire for our Ward.  Lately she has had a few problems playing.  She and I have had talks about memory loss/dementia/Alzheimer's as that sometimes happens when you hit certain ages.  She consider getting new glasses.  That is not her problem.  Unfortunately she has 2 cancerous tumors in her brain.

She is preparing for radiation and has a plan in place to take care of this latest setback.

You and I know the power of prayer and names on Temple rolls.  I'm sharing this blog (with her permission) so that I can ask you to join me in praying for my friend and her husband.  Please put their names on your Temple Prayer roll.

Bob and Myra Faye Earl.

Please tell your friends also.

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“Our Father in Heaven has promised us peace in times of trial and has provided a way for us to come to Him in our need. He has given us the privilege and power of prayer. He has told us to ‘pray always’ and has promised He will pour out his Spirit upon us.”

—Rex D. Pinegar, "Peace through Prayer," Ensign, May 1993, 66

Giving the Hunter the boot!

I realize that I'm behind the times in many things.  Some by choice and some by ignorance/innocence.  I just have to babble a minute about clothing/fashion/trends.  I've never been asked to talk about or do a fashion makeover for anyone.  Possibly because I might be one secretly surprised, by caring friends, for a needed fashion intervention?  In some areas of my life, admittedly, I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer.  Possibly I'm a brick shy of a full load?  but one thing I know for sure, I mean for sure!, that I will not be hoodwinked into doing free advertising for companies by wearing something with their logo brandished across my ample bosom or my broad back or my backside roundness!!

Knowing I've said this before about the old days and what they called sandwich boards but describing it again...  2 signs painted, with a menu on it, 2 connecting straps that go over person's shoulder.  They just slip it over their head and the straps rest on their shoulders.  They have some occasionally in Yakima.  a person pacing up and down with advertising for us to read. 

To me that is what logo's do.  You pay a high price to buy an article of clothing and yippee!--you then purchased the right to do free advertising as all constantly see that logo and then you also help further the cause, by announcing, to any within earshot, the logo name as you also have bought bragging rights with that spendy purchase.

People no longer just buy articles of clothing, they call them by the brand name.  A few years ago I was shocked out of my support hose when I was in Seattle and saw a store that displayed purses.  I couldn't believe my eyes!  it had glass cubicles and each held a purse.  a single purse.  just like displaying a jewel.  I just started chuckling (I'm so low class!).  I visited with the clerk and told her I was astounded at the idea of such a thing and would like to know the prices of the top sellers.  I was even more shocked by the prices.  I asked if I could take a picture of the inside display and she said...No!  I did go outside and take a picture with mall traffic.

I do like quality.  really I do.  purchasing value. we all have things that we so enjoy that we'd not dream of using any substitute but aren't some of these clothing items out of hand?  What are today's teens learning about by following like a bunch of sheep and then becoming prideful and judgmental?  Not saying all are.  Just saying it seems that would/could/is a problem.

What is bugging me?  totally stuck in my craw are boots!!  Not just any boots.  One kind.  Rain boots.
In Homer, most folks had (and most likely still do have them) what was called break-up boots. Rubber boots.  High black boots.  some had a brick red sole and toe guard that strengthened the boot so it wouldn't get a tear in it.  some were just plain black without the reinforcement.  They were usually upper calf height-wise but below knee.  A very practical thing.

Not real comfy as socks would work their way down.  Sometimes you'd get a blister. Feet would sweat as they were totally waterproof and they didn't always smell real fresh with no air circulating.  If they rubbed on the back of your calf it would chafe and leave a reddish line. They were practical and fortunate was the person who owned a pair of breakup boots!  In those days mud, ice, snow during breakup were a real pain in the neck and a real challenge.  Those boots were great!

Well, what do you know??!!  These old boots are now fashionable!  Why anyone would want to wear rain-boots all day is beyond me.  But I've seen them with my own eyes and heard people go wild over them!  Women and girls.

I'm thinking, if I were with it in today's world, I'd be a Frugalness Fashionista.  If I liked something currently fashionable then I'd figure out a way to copycat it and most likely brag about my accomplishment!  I would try my best to never be in the advertising business for any company and I know that is almost impossible but I'd at least save as much money as I could. If I had the nerve as a teen, I'd buy black rain boots, and when the Hunter brag started in, then I'd let the huntress know what I'd paid and where I bought mine and that I would never pay that much for a boot!  I'd acknowledge that she's lucky to be rich and that is not my case but I enjoy my own boots.  Maybe I'd get snippy and stick a Not Hunter name on boot front with my label maker!  (older folks seem to think they have nothing to lose and can say whatever comes to their mind and then to blog it!!  oh, my!!)

Uppity-ness because of possessions really irritates me.  Then I get myself in an internal mess because I'm being uppity myself in feeling they are definitely uppity.

This boot sort of thing is not a part of my life but I have family and friends and it's a part of their lives.  So then I chime in.  Maybe these are already here in Zillah.  I know they are the rage in Utah.  Maybe I'm stepping on booted toes.  Hope not.  Just saying what I feel with no filter so there is a risk factor.

Now if you want to wear sweaty old rubber boots all day indoors, at least shop around.  You can for sure beat the Hunter price.  I checked and lots stores have assorted styles at fantastic prices compared to this in your face boot.  I really like the socks as they roll over the top of the boot (Target has socks for $15).  that would absorb some of the moisture from piggies sweating and the socks come in all sorts of patterns.  See that logo on the Hunter sock?  Clever, clever marketing plan.  You pay them so you can advertise their product.  Brilliant.  Ummm....possibly scriptural reference ...conspiring men in the last days....?

The logo is displayed on both boot and socks and they are referred to as Hunter.  Oh, you've not seen them yet?  Let me introduce them to you....  tadum!!  drum roll!!!!!!....

Nordstrom's Hunter boot- $195.00

Nordstrom's Hunter sock-$50

Drumroll!!!

Tuesday night RS and I enjoyed it.  Joyce, the teacher, had each person write something that were striving for and had started in Jan. as perhaps a resolution or something new to add to their life.  I seem on this rampage of just throwing my entire life, warts and all, on life's big sky power point so I wrote...purging house.  I know Shannon & Jennie said my name as they read my blog.  I appreciate those that love me in spite of my total humanness.   I love them for not faulting me but following with interest, the antics of a woman as old as me that seems to have a loose screw with all I hold onto.

Enough about that!  Drum-roll please.......

Phase 1 of office is done!!  All sifted and sorted and trashed and tote stored and downsized immensely.

Morning!

Evening!

to much of a good thing!!

Why is one never good enough for me?  here ....2 of the 3 pieces of granite from the CR Temple.  1 of the 3 Nauvoo bricks.  from my parents things....Ivory snow geese.  Ivory letter opener.  Ebony/baleen letter opener.  Ivory scrimshaw bottle opener. carved wood butler.  and my Grandmothers sterling silver butter knife (yes.  it needs to be polished)  will give 2 granite and 2 Nauvoo bricks away.  will most likely put sentiments of my parents of shelf above computer where they have been.  Decorating etc. is not this first go round.

What I face when I sit at my desk.

Basket you ask?  Yes, filled with Conference Issues of Ensigns.  Rattan basket on bottom?...hanging files of Genealogy.  It's placement tells a lot of how much I do and may also represent what Kingdom I may end up in if I don't shape up!!  Middle antique suitcase?...filled with research books for something I wanted to write.  Top trunk?....totally filled with letters clear back from 1950's.  Letters I wrote my Aunt and she saved them.  Letters I wrote my parents.  Letters I wrote to Terry.  Letters Terry wrote to me.  And an unrelated non-letter pair of baby blue corduroy shoes that each of my boys wore as newborns!  It's all contained and ready for me to dig in and do something!!

Alaskan Oil painting.  Given to my parents in 1961.  Food caches.  I've seen this color reflected on the snow.  gorgeous! lavender looks to sharp with my little camera.  It's more dusky.  but you get the idea.

 Tomorrow starts our room!!!  Another huge challenge but I'm up for it!! 

Freedom on the horizon!!

Terry trying out his cherry wood walking staff that Greg made him!

Words found in file.  I do love the feeling below.  probably because it's not overwhelmed with stack of stuff!

why would this warm my heart?

last batch of stuff to sort and find desktop

looking better!!!

 I tried to put the above pictures after the paragraphs/picture first and it wouldn't let me so I'll end with what I wanted to start with.  Tomorrow I will be done with step one of my 4 step plan of #1 de-junking/downsizing.  Office will be done.  Closet is done.  Next?--under our bed!!!  Don't ask.  I'll tell when I unearth the treasures!

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I cherish words and thoughts and ideas that float into my thoughts.  I believe in crediting the thought receivers and I have no idea who was gifted with this truth but wish I could acknowledge them.  A lot of food for thought in this wee sentence. (see bottom of page.  I couldn't get it to move right here!)

I want to be me.  real. solid.  what I have the divine destiny to become.  to be me.  This is a freeing task.  I'm enjoying the process.  Look at me the plundering plow horse!!!

Fiercely determined to conquer bothersome obvious/subtle thorniness is a wonderful task.  True it's shocking how much I've managed to accumulate, and view most as treasure and not trash, but space is a limiting factor.  If I can't access what I would like to use then of what use is it?  Space is limited so possessions must also be limited.  The size is what it is.  It's not going to expand.  Decreasing by whatever method works for me is essential.

I have no time left to waste!!