A Candlestick: Father's Day

By the time you read this, Father's Day will be a thing of the past but, of course, will roll around next year. Each year this day becomes more precious to me. My own Father has been gone for many years now and in the aging process I'm closer to seeing him sooner than later. That isn't the precious part to me. The precious part to me is hearing my husband relive the babyhood and early childhood of our children, before hormones kick in those young bodies and often obliterate the child that once was. We are baby/toddler/children lovers in the Seljestad home. There are 4 sons and one daughter (that adores her girls). The boys also all love their children wholeheartedly and that is a joy to see.

I really like men that are tender. Gentle. Terry was that with all 5 of our children. He could not get enough of them. Parents have memories of how they felt and how they held and tended and cared and kissed and squeezed and rocked those little ones. Precious moments that just sail by. He and I talk about those times. They were/are wonderful!!

Today Terry heard from his sons and daughter and it's interesting to me that no one had a specific single memory but they each remembered feeling loved. At least judging by their comments, conduct, calls and expressions of love to him.

I think I'll share two....

Jeanee wrote this about her Dad and a picture she took of him.

When I was young and would hug my Dad, I remember him smelling of flannel, wood, diesel grease and Old Spice. He is priceless to me and his constant tender love throughout my life has been one of the greatest gifts he has given.

I took this picture a few years ago, before he retired. We have always had a picture in our kitchen of a peasant man praying over his broken bread. When I was visiting Mom and Dad in the summer, Dad always came home for lunch. As I sat across from him, I watched him bless his food and noticed how much he looked like the picture. I decided I needed to do my own version of that. The next day, Mom and I designed a set and put it in their kitchen to capture this photo of him. It shows his strong arms, his gentle face and his strong faith. I love you Dad.

***********************************************************

this is from our youngest son, Ben, on FB....

Happy Father's Day! Before I was born my birth mother was inspired that I would need a loving father, because the Kilcher's and Joyce T. spoke so highly of him she was again inspired to give me to this family. I am, and will be eternally grateful for this selfless act of love for me. I have the most amazing dad who listened to me and made me feel important. Even with his big mechanic hands was always gentle. I won't forget his kindness, never swearing once with me even when I smashed his thumb open with a Sheetrock hammer, he didn't know I was 'helping' him, he said, dagnabbit Ben why did you do that anyway'. This was the worst thing he ever said to me. I didn't realize as I child how lucky I was to have such a positive, sweet, gentle, loving father. As most people I took it for granted. Now I have my own boys and I try and be as good a father as I have, falling short I'm sure, but with such a great role model for my conditioning I've been able to pass on the spirit of love and kindness to my sweet boys.
Dad you are an angel on earth and no words can ever repay you for breaking a pattern of abuse coming from your upbringing to giving me a childhood where I felt important, wanted and constantly loved. Thankyou thankyou thankyou!

********************************************

So he had a wonderful day, going to Church...visiting with his cronies... holding newborn Brynn... using his tablet (which he still loves) and talking on the phone with children. Later, he visited with me about the importance of keeping that unconditional love...Love that is so bounteous when your children are very young... keeping it alive and continuous into their adulthood and into our own aging selfhood.

A dinner was planned with out firstborn coming over. Barbecuing rib-eye steaks the old fashioned way with charcoal. Nothing fancy. Just luscious steak, simple salad, unadorned baked potato, Texas toast....that sort of goodness.

They went out back to put the steaks on. Later I was at the sink doing something mundane. Looked out and the barbecue was afire!! Stuck my head out back door and told the chef, who was not anywhere near the barbecue, as he was showing off a tomato plant,-- Charcoal!!! Fire!!! (Proof below!!)