Some things I absorb piecemeal. JFK assassination and his brother Robert and Martin Luther King and seeing, on live TV, Lee Harvey Oswald shoot Jack Ruby. Things happening in my America. Then the horror of 9/11. It wasn't that I became immune or desensitized, or was it? A flurry of non-stop tragedy's with no time to recoup or catch my breath. A real life streaming of loss of lives by human deeds seemed to mix with weather disasters and over-sized accidents and my constant mantra...last days....last days....last days. I am actually witnessing, as prophesied, events that will happen in the last days.
And then....right in the midst of Christmas readiness, the unbelievable happened...Newtown. I felt overwhelmed with sadness for every one of us. I felt such love and such protective instincts for all of the little ones in the world and in my world. What gratitude I had for every single adult in that school and how hard they tried to protect those sweet children. This mayhem happened cross-country as children, in my little town, were coming over to our home to see the Christmas village and tree and Nativities.
I sat and wrote the following but just couldn't bring myself to post it at the time as news talk was everywhere it seemed.
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This best depicts my emotions with the impact of the slaying of fragile, innocent, harmless, helpless children. Little ones still in need of being directed on basic skills of life. Young brains, still working to learn and retain simple routine behavioral skills. Trusting souls that count on everyone older than them to watch out for their safety and well being. A life filled with constant reminders....look both ways before you cross the street....you need to take your bath now...tie your shoes or you will trip...yes, you may....no, you can't. Surrounded by love and encouragement for a job well done.....learning to read...discovering they are an artist or a singer...how to be kind and considerate.My youngest friend, Lydia, turned 7 on Sunday. I can't help but think of those other children her age that were probably so similar. Here is an example of her character. When she came to see the Christmas Village houses and tree and nativities with two of her 3 brothers, she greeted me with a hug. I told her...Happy Birthday! Lydia, you are free to touch anything you want and even pick it up. I know you'll be careful and you can really get a good look at the figures. The houses are wired in and can't be moved but you are welcome to pick up and look at all the rest. She shyly smiled and said...I don't think that is a good idea because my little brother, Cecil, doesn't know how to be careful yet. When her Mother came in with Cecil, she shared our conversation. I was impressed.
In reading of the traits of some of the children that are now gone, I was impressed with their strength and wisdom at a young age, just like Lydia. Extremely young! The little boy that told some children not to worry because he knew Karate and would take care of them. How brave.
I've said before that Christmas is the most comforting time to have tragedy. Everywhere we can see evidence, reminding us of His Birth and we have lights everywhere. We are more apt to hear music that heralds His Birth. What comfort, to those that have lost a little one, to be reminded of the available help from He whose birth we commemorate.
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I also didn't want to post as I really wanted to get a better grip on feeling the Lord is well aware of what has happened. My certainties in life, are found in the teachings of the Gospel. I expect to find answers to help me survive what ever besets me. I was comforted by several things as I pondered and looked things up.Not necessarily in any order but here are 6 pursuits of thought that gave me strength and hope and comfort and a dab of understanding the way things work and then a huge amount of faith increase.
1) The King Follett Funeral sermon by Joseph Smith (in Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith)
2) Touching Conference talks about death of children-assorted speakers
3) Thinking of Millennium happenings- about children that have died and parents raising them
4) Knowing the children are okay and what will happen to them. When I really thought about this idea, I found it quite astounding that not one child was 8 that died that day. There is absolutely no doubt, because of their age, beneath the age of accountability, that they are guaranteed a place in the Celestial Kingdom. What a comfort this must be to their parents, when they hear that, and it also comforts me. How faith promoting that it was an entire band of young stalwarts, angels on earth, all taken at one time. No doubt of their goodness. Not a particle of doubt. ...children who die before they arrive at the years of accountability are saved in the celestial kingdom of heaven. D&C 137:10
5) I thought back to Alma 14:8-11in the Book of Mormon-- the nightmarish scene, of women and children along with scriptures, being burned to death and Alma and Amulek forced to witness such a nightmare. The horror of the scene pained Amulek so much that he questioned Alma...
...How can we witness this awful scene? Therefore let us stretch forth our hands, and exercise the power of God which is in us, and save them from the flames.
But Alma said unto him: The Spirit constraineth me that I must not stretch forth mine hand; for behold the Lord receiveth them up unto himself, in glory; and he doth suffer that they may do this thing, or that the people may do this this thing unto them, according to the hardness of their hearts, that the judgements which he shall exercise upon them in his wrath may be just; and the blood of the innocent shall stand as a witness against them, yea, and cry mightily against them at the last day. vs.11
Alma than taught Amulek about, what I call The Cup of Iniquity Must Be Full, doctrine. Now this is what I understand-- when atrocities are committed, there must be absolutely no doubt that the dastardly deed was in fact done. At judgement a just judgement will be able to be given if there are witnesses. There will be no doubt of what they have done and the innocents they killed will stand as a witness against them.
Also Alma recorded earlier in Mosiah 17 about the burning of Abinadi. Abinadi would not recall his testimony even being threatened with death....Yea, and I will suffer even until death, and I will not recall my words, and they shall stand as a testimony against you. And if you slay me ye will shed innocent blood, and this shall also stand as a testimony against you at the last day. (vs. 10)
True the method of the recent destruction of these little ones was not a carefully calculated fire but nonetheless, innocents were destroyed and just judgement will be meted out.
I can turn to the TG and be reminded of how God will recompense through righteous judgement every deed...good or bad!
6) As I searched for the comfort of truth I was reminded that we will all die. President Kimball said that we may shorten our life by poor choices but we can't really lengthen it out. Now that's a paraphrase but it was in our RS manual when we studied his teachings. That goes along with Ecc. 7:17 Be not over much wicked, neither be thou foolish; why shouldest thou die before thy time? and then the marvelous one in D&C 42:43-48 about laying on of hands for the sick and it ends with...and is not appointed unto death, shall be healed.
Alma also shares about our earth life individual time-frames to accomplish designated work with Amulek. Alma has told him why they aren't going to use God's power, that they bear, to stop the atrocities. Amulek then wonders if they will burn them also. Alma 14:12-13
Now Amulek said unto Alma: Behold, perhaps they will burn us also.
And Alma said: Be it according to the will of the Lord. But, behold, our work is not finished; therefore they burn us not.
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There are all sorts of scriptures that can bring particles of peace and a smidgen of understanding of this maniacal deed, and similar ones, that we have no words to adequately describe what has taken place. The Gospel just never lets us down, does it? We can find certainty as we search and I found it. I love the scriptures!!! I feel more determined to love all the little children with greater affection that cross my path. I want to protect them and show them that life is good and they are good and there are a lot of good people that have their best interests at heart. I want to do my part to help them feel safe and loved.
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