Please...for my friend...

Remember my friend MaryLynne?...Battling cancer...this from her daughter Angela...

Mom will be completing her final few days of treatment in Mexico. I felt it best to do a fast tomorrow, in a combined thoughts and prayers for her health. If you are able, please join me in doing so... And please pass the word.

Thank you.
Much love,

Angela

I believe this...

Making progress!

Really thinking about the power of words.  Words that we say that wound.  Sometimes we receive and sometimes we give those wounding words.  Maybe, we don't even know how deep they go.  Maybe, we think it's not a big deal.  Maybe, we don't know that it's like we branded someone with pain that is so deep that it seems to last forever.  Maybe this is why the Lord wants us to forgive.  and along with it forget.  to dilute the power of what was said.  to obliterate it.  to allow the Atonement to wash over our pain and wash away the words?  Maybe.

Dixie and I talked today about pain.  We talked about incidents of words...words that had caused lasting damage.  We talked about the importance of letting go and healing.  The Gospel is for that purpose don't you think?

Going through these pictures and seeing a portion of my life unfold before my eyes, it brought up questions.  and pain.  Pain that I remember how I felt and she remembers nothing so she feels nothing.  My parents left us with our Grandmother and they went to Alaska to work.  To Galena?  To build after the war?   Was it 9 months they were gone?  Was it a year and a half?  How old were we?  Was I 5?  4?  Dixie- 2?

I will find the answers later on but not now.  a few years before my Mother died I interviewed her on video.  I asked her about that time of our life and for the life of me, I can't remember the details.  That is one of the reason I am sorting and sifting pictures... So I can put that video together, with the pictures, as she explained them to me.

Things got a bit overwhelming in the scope of sorting but I did get Greg's package off and also Dixie's.  Jeanee will be here in January and we will go through everything I've done up to that point.

me in pink dress!

loved seeing my parents & grandparents holding me as a baby!

Our family of 4.  My Dad at almost 3.

I was going to save all of this for our family reunion in 2015 but decided to share pictures now on the extras.

Today when I studied the Scriptures, I felt so thankful for the Gospel and the power there is in Scriptures/Conference Talks, that elevate thoughts and heal hurts.

Staying the course...

Sort of an offbeat Wednesday...Terry (my sweet guy) had some health struggles off and on....I went to a funeral and had to repent during the service for wanting a speaker to sit down and stop talking...  We had ordered chicken from Zaycon Foods and that had to be packaged for freezing....It was the Halloween party at the Church (decorations were gorgeous!!).  I didn't go but took some chopped nuts that I'd signed up for...thought about all everyone else accomplishes, those I am even barely acquainted with or really know, and all the things they accomplish in the course of a day or a week or hey!, their entire life portfolio, and my Co-Dependency just oozes out my pores.  Co-D's compare and feel inadequate, less than etc. etc., when they are acting out.  Do I need some sort of intervention?  Co-d's have to intervene in their own behalf!!  As Scarlett O'Hara said in Gone with the Wind....Fiddle dee dee.  I'll think about that tomorrow!

Obviously I have a lot on my mind tonight but it's to late to make any sense of what I'm thinking of!

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I'm working on Batch # 2.  My Aunt kept a scrapbook of pictures of me as a little girl & some of Dixie when she entered the scene, my Dad as a little boy, my grandparents, and my parents when they were starting their married life.  All sorts of things in that time frame.  Sampler below....

I'm going to divide these and give 1/2 to my sister.  Enough for my kiddos also!

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Found another picture of us at Anchorage High School as Seniors.  This was upstairs and we were waiting for classes to change.  Typical clothes for the day... Me-- skirt/sweater/white collar/flowers at neck/matching earrings/also, not seen-matching sweater socks.  Him--white shirt-open collar-rolled shirt sleeves/jeans/flat soled Converse tennis shoes (that were cheap and everyone wore them). Me-- ponytail with a scarf.  He--flat-top....

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I'm so thankful that the Lord looks to my heart and thoughts.  He knows I intended to make this gorgeous pumpkin with tacks and flowers....

my heart's desire

my reality

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When I found this picture of my beautiful Mother it startled me and made me teary with longing to see her and just wishing we could sit down and really talk.  I mean really share our hearts.  That is what my mind has been on is relationships and why they sometimes aren't like we thought they would be or hoped they would be or want them to be.  It's mulling over in my mind, the complexities of all our interactions with each other- family or friends- such complications at times.  Well, it seems that way to me tonight. I will share when the mental puzzle pieces are all turned over to get a clearer picture.  Even looking at this picture now makes me tear up. I would love to hug her.

I love you, my beautiful Mother- xoxoxxo

Child's play....

One thing I'd really do with my kiddos...I'd watch like a hawk for something that they seemed to have an interest in and give them opportunities to see if that was a skill or talent or gift that they would enjoy.  Maybe even have a life skill and ability to earn a living could surface.

I know I've told you before about our Engineer son but I just have to put a plug in for watching your children, even at play.  Greg is the one that early on was fascinated in how things worked and would take things apart.  I've blogged about him before.  It amazes me that this curious boy, always trying to figure out how things worked and designing things and making things, would end up at the headquarters of Caterpillar...a design engineer!

He recently designed "forks" capable of handling a load of marble.  When we were in Kansas, Greg took his Dad down to show him the product, all packed for shipping.  Lance and Terry are sort of blocking the fork but you still get the idea.  proud moment for the Dad!!  He doesn't look happy but he really was!!

Forks.  Lance and Grampa

Forks arrived in China??  (I need to ask Greg)

Forks in Italy doing what they were designed to do...Marble

Greg in Italian marble quarry checking out his forks!!

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I'm still on task!  Only a couple of days, and months more of time needed, but I'm making headway with my sort and identify task of Batch #1.  Aunt Bonnie's copies of old photos, pretty much 6 copies each, one for keepers and 5 to give to my kiddos.  Making headway from when I started!

moving ahead with my goal.  sort.  stack.  sort.  stack.

sort and sort and sort.   stack and stack and stack.

and sort/stack!!!  picture of my sister and I with both of our Grandmothers!  only one I know of!!

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Found a tiny little Polaroid of my favorite dance partner in the whole wide world.  We were seniors and this was our senior prom picture.  We were breathlessly in love!! To this day I remember how gorgeous that dress was!  A heavy satin.  pale blue. had a reverse satin band under bust that was decorated with jewels.  Strapless top was high and pleated in some way that made it gorgeous.  a fitted dress that was gored clear up to that trim.  snug at waist and very full skirt... lots of room for crinolines.  Swished when you walked and so fun to dance in!!  I wore silver strappy hi-heels.  rhinestone bracelet and earrings. pink nail polish and pink lipstick.  Jungle Gardenia perfume. and a big wrist corsage that CuteFace gave me.  Him?- a grey suit.  If a time could be described food wise in feeling?....this was a scrumptious time in our young lives.  I thought my sister had the gown hanging in her closet.  Turns out she doesn't!  She thought I had it!  Neither of us knows where it is. 

Worth a thousand words?????

I have to add a note to the marriage blog yesterday.  My marvelous friend Tamera sent this as a part of an email in talking about the blog post.  I loved it so much that I asked if I could share it.  She said yes.....

We had the sweetest reminder to continue to have time with each other last night.  Friday is date night.  We were at Chuck Wagon for dinner.  As always, we sit on the same side of the booth, side by side.  We always have. I got up to fill my plate and this sweet woman got up and intercepted me.  She had tears in her eyes and was nervous.  She stopped me and said "I don't want to interrupt you or anything- but I have been watching you and your husband.  You are sitting next to each other and I can see you are in love.  I'm a widow, I wish I could go back and spend our time sitting next to each other.  So many of the world's problems could be solved if husbands and wives sat next to each other,  Married people don't sit together- teenagers do, not marrieds."  Norman got up and joined us and she repeated it all to him.  She was so sweet and sincere. How sweet of her to tell us. 

I think that is such a tender story!  thanks for letting me share Tamera.  I am so impressed that you make time, take time, make the effort to keep your relationship alive and healthy.  Inspiring!

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Welcome beautiful October!!!  I LOVE the changing of the seasons!!  The gentleness of fall and the magnificence of the colors and the softness of the temperature that just seems to caress and envelope me, is a bit of heaven on earth.  I don't want my old chairs put up yet but I know it's getting time.

Isn't this thought lovely?...

Then summer fades and passes, and October comes.  We'll smell smoke then, and feel an unexpected sharpness, a thrill of nervousness, swift elation, a sense of sadness and departure.--Thomas Wolfe

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No matter the season my heart is attuned to it but my actions are always out of sync.  Must be Terry's fault because he decided it was time to do this!....  seems off beat to me but he did it anyhow!...

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Terry has a new challenge!  one that makes me sick to my stomach of what may happen in the fixing process.  I seem to attach the word love to anything I enjoy...people and yes, even objects.  I love my family and my friends and I love my small paved driveway.  It has been such a nice thing for a lot of years.

Our driveway is erupting!!!  is it some underground thing that will suddenly  have cracks and raises all over the place?  What roots lurk underground, causing such dismay to my heart.  Not only because of what it will most likely do to our driveway but also because this can't be fixed with Terry's duct tape (now you talk about loving things- he loves duct tape.  uses it as frequently as others taking aspirin on a regular basis.)

I showed him this....
 

you can't really see how raised it is!!  but it is!

 He tried to weigh it down with this...

Then I noticed he did this...

what next?  I'm scared.  He's thinking to drill a circle out and kill whatever has taken up resident.  Yep.  Me not having good vibes.  Will he keep increasing the blocks?  At least it centered itself.  I suggested putting a barrel planter on it and he vetoed that idea real quick.

What on earth crawled under there and has roots so strong as to cause this mess??

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I'm taking on another project.  Long overdue as is my ineffective system for accomplishing most tasks.  I have ideas that are so over the top, so grandiose, for practically every single thing I want to accomplish in life.  I bypass the basic practicality of things, the simple, the simplicity of order and mentally go for something ready for Broadway! and there is never an opening night!  So in the realm of dreams beyond scope, like planning to scan all pictures, write about each one and make a movie with music and give copies to all of my children....and with the exit lane road markings of my life span starting to look sort of square and in a line!!... I decided to get practical and sort the pictures!  Reining myself in and not dreaming to big (is eventually scanning, writing, background music- over the top?  Is it hard to scan?  I can learn?)

So here is step one in my sensible practical plan of what needs to be done...sort/identify!!  My Aunt sent me these pictures when she was living + copies for my children!!.  note the word was living.  My niece, who is not at all like me, took my sisters set (she got one also!) and has put them on Family Search etc.  I also have lots of others that aren't from my Aunt.  

All of this being said and again, sticking my neck out there and declaring I am going to do this, and even I think this will prove interesting to see how far I really go with this simple plan.  Sorting and identifying the pictures.

Here is my first table full of super old pictures.... 

 I checked my index numbers.  It only took me indexing 4,370 names and I felt the inkling to start this project.  I think it did something to my heart and made me start to care about these pictures?  Uh-huh--thinking so.   

Always faithful to spouse???....

Sunday, the speakers were asked to address the Family Proclamation, and just choose and expound/elaborate on whatever they wanted out of the address.  It was a bit over-packed with speakers but still a great meeting.

Two of the speakers were older.  Both had lost their spouses.  6 months ago my friend Myra Faye passed away.  Her husband was one of the speakers and my heart went out to him to speak on the day of that milestone of her leaving his life.  He had to pare his talk down but I was so touched with what he shared.

The last week of her life, Bob worked on what he wanted to tell his family, about life and marriage.  After her funeral he had a special family meeting with their 3 sons and their entire families.  He shared some of the things he and Myra Faye did on a regular basis, to strengthen their marriage and their family.  Praying together twice every day, blessing their food every day, reading the scriptures  together every day.  (they also worked in the Temple each Saturday) He talked about focusing on the Gospel and how things were so different in the world compared to when he was a boy or when they were first married.

I was glad he shared a part of that special family meeting.  A daughter-in-law told me it was a truly sacred family time that evening.

My friends- Carol and Jackie also shared love of their families and the Gospel.  As did the youth speaker.  It was one of those super special Sacrament meetings.

As you know I've been married for ages and beyond the commitment to just stay together, honor our Temple covenants and not bale out- I really think this article sums up the base of what is needed to protect your marriage.  I know I've shared before the impact that an old cassette recording...Out of the Blue like a Scheduled Airline...had on me.  I feel this article is terrific and you need to read it and share it with your spouse!

I've seen marriages fall apart when the counsel in this article was ignored.  Be aware.  Prepare!!!

10 Ways you are Being Unfaithful to your Spouse, and Don’t Even Know It

By Gary and Joy Lundberg

Having an affair is not even on your radar. Never gonna happen. You love your spouse and you'd never be unfaithful to her or him. However, you may be unaware of other ways you are being unfaithful.

read the excellent article here