Worth a thousand words. Easily.

Yesterday was what I'd call a lovely day.  Spent part of it in company of a friend celebrating her birthday, special lunch, and getting caught up on our lives that are on different paths/stages...sharing a special heart connection.

In the evening, sorting through the mail, I saw the new Ensign.  I started to leaf through it and my attention was riveted right out of the chute seeing this painting.  Artist is Frans Schwartz.  It was the illustration for President Uchtdorf's First Presidency message.  I believe every single word he wrote as truth. "...He will strengthen, encourage, and bless us.  He will encircle us in His gentle arms." I know we can be encircled by His gentle arms.  the thought makes me teary and my heart tells me, once again, that it really is true.  I muddle and mull my way through mortality but one thing certain in my life is belief in the Atonement and His power to comfort me.  When things are not in muddle/mulling mode with me trying to understand/learn/figure things out, and I'm faced with things/experiences/challenges beyond my scope...that comfort is there.

Agony in the Garden

I am fascinated, strengthened, comforted and taught by renderings of Gethsemane.  Most especially depictions of Luke 22:43 And there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him.

Years ago the Ensign (then the New Era) printed paintings by Carl Bloch.  All of us were amazed at scriptures coming to life in such vivid detail.  I don't remember his Gethsemane print at that time but at some point, again the Ensign, printed, in conjunction with an article a small picture of Christ in Gethsemane.

It was the first one I'd seen with the Savior receiving that heavenly help.  I ordered a large one and a smaller one.

The large one I kept in it's original cellophane wrap. The large picture has darkness all around but the center is the light of Christ. There have been times when friends are really suffering that I take the picture to them, share my feelings about it, and let them borrow it until the crisis has subsided or they feel okay about what is happening in their lives.  Because it's not framed they can slip it under or behind something and take it out when they want to think of the available help from Christ.  to ponder what He went through to learn/know how to help each of us.  My friend Myra Faye had the picture at two different times.  Right now a friend struggling/battling the odds of mortality, has it. Last I saw it propped up in her office.

Christ in Gethsemane

 
I have my own favorite framed. a small one that is cropped.  I have never hung it.  it just seems so personal and I have it propped behind my copier!  I know that seems irreverent but I always see it, take it out from time to time, look at it and am reminded of the Atonement.  I have been thinking lately of hanging it but most likely I'll keep it tucked back here in the office.

The very thought of this happening-- of our Father in Heaven, sending an angel to comfort His Son...of His Son learning how to help us.  well, it just strengthens me and comforts me over and over. and over.  It is such a hope-filled idea.  I believe it.  I draw on it.  It is real.  It is true.

This month in YW we are talking about the Atonement and I'm looking forward to sharing Elder Uchtdorf message and bringing my print to show them and share my testimony and belief.

Hopefully I can get the Schwartz print, to share with my Laurels, before the month is out but right now they are 3 weeks out.  Plus WA has different taxes across the board so you can't order online.  you have to call.  If you are in WA then call 801-422-8214 to order Frans Schwartz print.  You can go to BYU Museum of Art store to see sizes/prices.  If you are out of WA you shouldn't have any trouble at all ordering from BYU-MOA.  Now this print would be a great visual for a FHE in talking about the Atonement. well, in my book it certainly would be.

here is a neat deal about Frans Schwartz www.youtube.com/watch?v=CogjXjwwbqY  

Still mulling- Part B

 Still thinking about callings and teaching and love.  So Susie, that I mentioned yesterday sent that note to me and then I sent one to her and then Monday she sent me one more.  I'm sharing as it really reminds me of the power of love...the power we have within us to give and also the power we receive when we receive love.  Love is truly all there is.

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Sent: Sunday, February 22, 2015 1:31 PM
To: Nancy Seljestad
Subject: Love you 

My dear,
I am preparing my SS lesson for 16/17 year olds. I just keep thinking about HOW you taught me.
Not WHAT you taught me, but how.

The answer is love. You loved me. And yes, I have tears coursing down my cheeks. Thank you for loving me when I needed it most. I love you.

Susie

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On Sun, Feb 22, 2015 at 5:14 PM, Nancy Seljestad  wrote:

oh, sweetie, now you make me cry.  it's amazing that you just love someone and at a tender time in their life, they feel it, and years later they still feel it!!  and when you love someone, like I loved you, it holds and you always ALWAYS love that person!!!  I love you darling Susie.  I so appreciate the fact that you shared and reminded me that love is really all there is.  you can strip away all the trappings but what it really boils down to is plain old sincere true love.  what a blessing you are to those girls!!  lucky them and lucky us for having crossed paths and miles and distance and all of that doesn't amount to a hill of beans.  It's love for sure!!!

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from Susie on Monday Feb 23



Thank you.  Well put.  After my Sunday School class, I went to RS which I didn't think I would get to go to and lo and behold, the lesson was Dallin Oaks' talk on Loving Everyone and it really hit home that that is what everything boils down to. You were a good example of that to me.  Yes, love you still and always will.

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This exchange with Susie really made me look to my heart....I'm asking myself if I still love as openly/honestly/wholeheartedly as I did for all those many years.  Have I shied away to a certain extent?  am I as joyful in relationships?  do I talk myself out of being me?  do I hold back in fear of rejection?  do I allow past negative events to fill me with self-doubt?  Co-d types certainly do and I do see shadows/shades of that with my inner vision.  Am I comfortable in my own skin to the point I just am...am who I am???  Do I represent my true self?

Love.  That is the key.  Me loving me and loving everyone else AND letting them know that I love them.  Not necessarily mush-gush but reaching out and leaving no doubt, that those I'm in contact with, are important to me and I love them.  

Just thinking and mulling things over.  Still!

Mullings...

The last while I've thought about the importance of callings in the Church.  Callings extended and accepted are what gives us programs to attend/enjoy/learn from in our Ward.  As you age you are usually sort of phased out...and I think that is fine.  Young parents with young children and teens, need those callings to keep them active in Church.  Older folks need to set the example that they are in Church because they have a testimony and it's the place to be.  So as an older folk (although I feel younger at heart and in my mind.  not so much young on the body rating!)  I'm so happy to have this calling to teach the Laurels.

Anyhow I digress.  There is a side to service that I never thought of until a few days ago.  You know that I'm doing my monthly family note writing and I feel good about it.  I received a thank you note from a woman...she is probably 44 and I was closely involved in her life 30 or so years ago.  Her teen years.  Especially her senior year.

She wanted to thank us for the many ways you served me.  She said- the obvious: My Bishop. She then listed some things that I was involved with.  I think I'll copy what she said because it really hit me hard that we never know, when we are serving with love and loving those we serve, how it will linger in their memory and impact those in our care/teaching for their later lives.  Her note....

So I wrote those 3 above paragraphs, started to copy what she said and then got sidelined (as I'm prone to do!).

Really I think at this age you end up with some sort of identity crisis.  Your body is older and things you used to do?...you simply don't do it.  Either you can't or you simply don't want to.  I see my brain actually thinks young but my body is not young.  When my brain was actually young and my body also, I think of all the activities I was involved in and loved doing with the YW of the Church.  Now I take my young thinker old brain and my fully old body with years heaped on it and I ask myself....what about these Laurels that I teach?  How do I reach them so that I can touch their hearts?? 

So totally shifting gears here...because of the above note from 44 year old, Kirsten, I referenced and sweet 40 year old Ami's comment a couple of days ago and a note I got from 50 something
 Susie...I was reminded that love is what it is all about!!  The world is definitely not the same as when I was involved with these other Laurels that are now women but  the underlying common connecting emotion, no matter the age of these now women, that I still view as girls, was love.  I loved them.  They knew it.  They could feel it.  You can't fake loving a teen.  You either love them or you don't.  Teens I've gotten to really know, love to be loved, in that they always met me at least halfway in accepting what I had to offer. 

This Sunday note from Susie really touched me. She entered my life when she was 16. Reminding/teaching me the value of unconditional love really popped out.  It surprises me how everlasting love is.  I still love these girls that are now women and yet they are still my girls.

My dear,
I am preparing my SS lesson for 16/17 year olds. I just keep thinking about HOW you taught me.
Not WHAT you taught me, but how. 
The answer is love. You loved me. And yes, I have tears coursing down my cheeks. Thank you for loving me when I needed it most. I love you

I want that same strong connection with these Laurels that I now teach...  a new and different program...  modern Laurels in a modern world...a world that doesn't always clearly reflect the Lord's path  and yet they are still daughters of God... so sweet and beautiful in His eyes.

Transitioning within takes a lot of thought.  Being co-dependent, I'm thinking, maybe I shouldn't put this in...what if someone thinks I'm bragging in some way....what if...what if..  I think I'll be more capable of Loving the Lovely Laurels if I really accept and love myself!!

Hope...

I'm plugging away here and not taking the time to share what I'm thinking while I'm plugging along but my heart is thinking and feeling and loving my blog readers.

With all the things going on in the world I thought this was a good thought to hold onto...

Wisdom...

I have enjoyed this old saying.....

William Edward Norris said:

If your lips can keep from slips,

Five things observe with care:

To whom you speak; of whom you speak;

And how, and when, and where.

Agree?????? I do!

History repeating itself...

Recently our Sunday Sacrament program was done by our youth- introducing this years theme for the YW/YM.  They did all of the talks and had a combined choir of YM/YW.  2nd hour the Stake YM President and our Bishop both talked on the subject of dating to all of the youth and their parents.  They used an Ensign from 2010 about dating standards of the Church with quotes from Prophets and For the Strength of Youth pamphlet.  3rd hour they went to their regular classes which in my case was YW.

I studied the faces of all those young people seated on the stand and thought of how many seated in the congregation love them.  Of course their parents do but in the Church there are lots of us that care also.  Parents pray and so do those of us working with them. 

My time of working with the youth goes back a long time.  I was taken aback when I got called to serve in the YW and yet I know it's where the Lord wants me at this time.  Maybe there is one girl that really needs my love and encouragement.  Maybe they all need to hear my plain talk on things like our recent chastity lesson.  I really don't know.  I just know that they have a special place in my heart and I'm always concerned for them.  The basic standards are the same as way back in 1965 (?) when I taught my first Laurel class. (50 years ago!!  Older than the mothers of my Laurels today!!)

The Church standards have not changed but the world has.  The youth didn't have the challenges of drugs/homosexuality/pornography/rampant sexual activity/foul language, like they do in today's world.  I look at these girls and wonder...how do they fight this battle of worldliness?  I surely don't say anything any different than they've heard for their entire life.  I do back up the teachings that their parents teach them but I say nothing new.

When I looked at them, I could see YW similar in countenances that I've known over the past.  Those that are restless.  Those that are searching.  Those that are content and also the dis-content.  Those that try so hard and those that are sick of rules.  Those wanting to carry on their current religious home life, into their own future home, that they will someday create.  Those waiting to escape, what they feel are restrictive rules, with no interest in perpetuating their home lifestyle.  Some are filled with a strong sense of immunity, to any heartache that might befall them, as they know they know better than anyone else, what is best for them.

In many ways I am not the teacher I was when I started all those years ago.  I'm the same woman but I'm all grown up!  well, I think I am, anyhow!  I have an even stronger conviction of the Gospel and I know you can't fool God and you also can't bend commandments and sneak and think you will end up just fine.  Some girls don't believe that. 

For me...my utmost hope and prayer is to help these YW feel the Spirit.  To aide them in enjoying the baptism gift that they each received....the Holy Ghost.  To feel, to sense, to access through prayer that connection from heaven....their own Liahona for personal guidance!!!!