Valentines Day...a day focused on expressing love! A beautiful day that is filled with gratitude for those one loves and also those that love one back!
This recent particular Valentines Day, will be remembered always, as the day someone I love and she loved me, passed on. We'd known each other for 53 years. Did you pick up on...we'd known each other...not--we'd been friends.
We met in Anchorage. She, and other Church friends, had purchased some property, on a lake...thinking ahead for a future Church Camp. She loved everything about Girls Camp.
We were not at all alike. I was stunned when I realized that she did not like me. At all. A bit awkward...she was the Stake Camp director when I was called as the Stake YW President.
I was relieved that she had that calling and knew the ropes. I knew no ropes.
I was thrilled to be teaching a Laurel class and suddenly, with zero experience, I was the Stake leader. I'd never been in a Ward position in YW other than teaching Laurels (which was all I wanted to do for my entire life!)
I read the Handbook about how Stake things work and also about Ward things...met with my equally inexperienced counselors and we moved forth. I went on faith. I knew from a dream that I was to do this calling and also that these two women were to be my counselors.
What was not covered in the instruction handbook --the fact that a lot of people already knew all about the contents-- so that put me in an awkward position of doing things that others did not approve of. To my shock I learned that there were people that actually had really strong feelings against me.
And...they let me know.
I was way out of my league and it about destroyed me. Remnants are still a bit lodged?
Pat, let it be known of how she felt about me. I was a hugger and she was an icicle. She would make sure I never touched her or got near her. As if I'd want to hug her!
I was so relieved when we were going to move out of Anchorage and go to Homer. It was such a relief to leave some really bad experiences behind. (the good outweighed the bad and I had fantastic experiences during that time of Church service. It was amazing. I loved that time but at the same time it was a very hard harsh time.)
Time went by and to my horror, one day it was announced at Church-- Pat and her husband had bought one of the two grocery stores in town and would be in our Branch! I about passed out! Our little Branch to be inflicted by her animosity towards me!
I was heartsick. I prayed as to what to do. No one knew anything about the Anchorage happenings. The idea came to me...I needed to tell her that we were going to be best friends!
It was an overwhelming thought and made me sort of nauseous but....
She arrived...gave me stink-eye... and I went over to her and to her horror...I hugged her and said...you and I are going to be the very best friends.
She shook off my hug and gave me a shocked look of not in my lifetime!
I did as moved by the Holy Ghost and my warmth melted her ice. She said I was to sweet. I felt she was unfeeling. It took a lot of concentrated effort but in memory it doesn't seem like it took a real long time before we were true friends.
Years later, I'd laugh as each phone conversation would end with her saying something about...I'm going to talk mushy and tell you I love you.
We were involved in so many things together and enjoyed all of them. We logged up a lot of friend experiences...memories that we valued so much.
One year, when she'd moved from Homer to Oregon, she called and said...I just have to see you one more time. Please come see me. Her health was still good but she just wanted to see her friend. It was wonderful.
A couple of years ago, her son and a couple from Homer, went on a trip to see Homerites that lived Stateside. It was such a great reunion.
As her health declined, she just kept doing all that she could. Eventually, the decline picked up speed and went on and on-- she couldn't work at the Temple and she couldn't drive and a small stroke hit her and then a bit of dementia etc. etc.... and then Hospice recently.
And then on the day of focused love she passed on.
Our last visit was a week or so ago. She retold some stories and then shared that her ordered casket, from Costco, had arrived and it was in the garage. She asked me...What color is it?? I said...Pink and flowers. She laughed and said...You know me so well! White with pink flowers.
Yes. I did know her well and I loved her with all of my heart and she felt the same about me.
No comments:
Post a Comment